I Turned 41 and Bought a Horse

Ha!!! Apparently middle age has me all ….” NO MORE WAITING!”  Yes, you did read that title right. In 2018 I turned 41 in August and fell in love with a horse named Handsome George. I should probably back up one more year and share that in 2017 I turned 40 and decided I wasn’t waiting anymore and signed my self up for horse riding lessons. To say I fell in love right away is an understatement .. well I fell in love with the horses.

I did not fall in love with riding. I mean come on !! Have you tried a posting trot when you are 50 lbs over weight ? It is dreadful and a pretty quick reminder that you need to start getting in shape; if you want to make it around the arena at least once in a trot.

I tried to blame the horse but that didn’t seem believable.

So after I used up my Groupon lesson.. I decided that no matter what,  I was continuing with horse lessons. The calm that  these animals brought me was incredible.

You see I suffered from incredible anxiety. I always thought my life was going too good so obviously my brain needed to tell me that I would be punished somehow so I was always waiting for worst case scenario. I would be enjoying and laughing with my kids and then my mind would say “nope, you better stop because something awful is going to happen to them if you are happy, be prepared for the worst because it is happening.” This is how everyday was … I would be booking Dr. appointments for all of us because I thought one of us had lumps or rashes that would mean certain death.. or heart pain and head pain that meant I was obviously having a heart attack or  brain aneurism. It was awful around here. My husband could only listen for so long to me telling him  his children or wife had some awful thing happening to them.

Alright back to this horse business…. So yes that hour of focusing on something else was amazing, the calm that these animals brought me is something I can’t even put into words.. even as I type I want to cry with grateful tears for taking that leap and signing up. Thank goodness for turning 40!

So 6 weeks into my lessons it was a rainy night and I was placed on this big boy named George. As we were riding something outside spooked him and he did a little hop; that was it, I felt like I needed to keep him safe, After the lesson while I was untacking him, he bent his head to mine and I took in a big breath and the calm that filled me was inexplainable. This horse and I were connected. I only rode George one more time in my lessons but for the next year our connection would only become stronger. 

From September to December I continued to take lessons because I was super smart and bought a pack of  12 when there was room on the credit card… I know you are all applauding my for my genius thinking …. but by January I needed to come up with a plan because this riding thing was not cheap!  So imagine my delight when in February’s A&T Equestrian Newsletter they were advertising that Adults could join in on the work credit program… what does this mean you ask?  It meant that  not only did I have a way to pay for my lessons but that I would be able to work with the horses as well! WOO HOO!!

OH MY GOSH the pure joy I felt walking into the barn that morning of my first shift, will stay with me forever!  Of course once that 4 hour shift of cleaning stalls and carrying water buckets back and forth was done I couldn’t move any muscles. BUT the horse snuggles were endless!!!  Also this is how I was able to spend time with George as well.

Alright lets jump ahead 11 months to December 2018 and there are talks of the barn findingi a more suitable home for george… (  because he really is a 1 person horse… meaning I am that 1 person)

I didn’t  hesitate ! I was in the office  and was like I will buy him!!!!!!!  Do you want to think about it Aubrey? NOPE he is MINE!!! Merry Christmas to me…. I didn’t have a job I didn’t run it by my family I just knew this HORSE was my heart!  he calmed me, brought me joy, loved me and I needed him…..

This is the day I made my dreams happen!!

Now I won’t go into much detail on how my hubby reacted or how his friends like to re enact what he had to say to them about his wife buying a horse… It’s all good now! Lets just say I have 3 jobs  and a happy husband lol

 

XOXO

A

Labour Day aka day before school starts

I am in disbelief that September is here and come this week our household will contain a preschooler and a grade one student!!!! (Not to mention a newly 39 year old) I don’t want to talk about it. Although I am starting to embrace it.

I know we are constantly told that time moves quicker as we get older, moments fly by and turn into a fast forward commercial of your life. I  thought I would try and slow this summer down .. we planned to have an unplanned summer and we did!!! It was awesome: pyjamas until noon, evening park dates, late lunches and bedtimes, no rushing off to classes. I am going to call it our “1988 summer”.  We took our first family road trip this year and even managed to make it to see my parents on the sunshine coast more than once!  Our summer was full of memories and jam packed with family time and it still flew by no matter how hard I reed to slow it down.

I am sad for the summer to end I am going to miss hanging out with the kids all day and our mini adventures, today I am bummed and sad and that’s ok.  Tomorrow I will be excited for E and J to see their friends and teachers that they missed this summer and for all the stories that they are going to share about their days at school but today I am going to enjoy our last day of summer for 2016 (our 1988 summer)

Wishing everyone a wonderful back to school/work tomorrow!!!

XOXO

A

Motivated

Why is it so hard for me to commit to a healthy lifestyle. I am literally huffing and puffing when I am walking and so uncomfortable in my body but instead of doing something about it I am just causing more discomfort. I managed to eat junk and drink coffee all day yesterday. The bonus was that I managed to get in 10,000 steps . (thank goodness for my Fitbit)

Today the plan of action is to get out walk the neighbourhood with the kidlets, drink water, stay within my WW point range and to go to bed by midnight. Totally doable right?  Okay drinking first glass of water as I type!

I have to say I am feeling motivated today:

My house is clean because I had the Parent Advisory Committee over yesterday to plan our year of events

I have had a shower. I can’t believe how hard this task can actually be somedays

I love this Canadian made brand of body products. You must visit a skoah location and be pampered with their amazing facials. 

Kids are calm .. It feels like I am in a dreamy bubbly right now it will probably burst in about 30 minutes but I am going to take the time and enjoy it before it does.

Alright wish me luck

XOXO

A

 

Let’s begin

Day one of the Blog

ok here goes! Yesterday was my first Weight Watchers meeting in a month…. for those of you who don’t know WW.. you are supposed to go weekly to weigh in, get motivated and share your struggles with food .. its kinda like group therapy but with cheerleaders.

I have had a really tough time staying on track with WW. My Mother gave me a membership for my birthday  (awesome gift BTW) but I just can’t seem to stick with it. I have managed to gain 7 pounds since I started in October. I am frustrated and disappointed with myself and the stress of failing at this and wasting such an awesome gift is working against me… I am stress eating  instead of focusing on staying on plan and exercising.I hate how uncomfortable I feel in my skin and how hard activities like tying my shoes and walking up stairs has become. I am not used to this and I need to get a handle on things. (get this lady some cheese to go with her WHINE)

Anyways the only reason I went to the meeting was because I was running late for my first Barre class and the thought of being late mortified me more than my need to workout… I know it is backward thinking but I need to be prepared for a new place and class.

 (hoping this is me in a few weeks being like “ya I do Barre”)

I went to the WW meeting which BTW I got the times mixed up and actually showed up for the last min of the meeting… so now I am without fitness and motivation and it is only 10:15am on a saturday morning… So I weigh in and wow nothing has happened in the last 4 weeks. The highlight was the fact that there was no weight gain …. YAY???

I left feeling blah vowing that I would make sure to show up next Saturday for the meeting before Barre class. We will see how that goes. So far I have managed to eat almost all the treats I bought at WW (they were suppose to last all week) but now I have consumed 6 bags of popped BBQ chips for a total of 12pts and those tasty chocolate pretzel bars didn’t even have a chance.

How is it only day 2 in my week and I have already eaten enough food for tomorrow too? I did manage to get out for a walk with a girlfriend last night and today I hit my 10,000 steps. Wish me luck for next Saturday’s meeting!!

XOXO

A